How cute is that?

Miranda loves to draw and paint. She loves to create. Here is a picture she drew of me, mommy! She told me the straight sticks on the top is my hair, my 2 eyes, nose, mouth, the 2 circles on the side are my ears and the lines next to my ears are my legs! Not bad for my little girl who's not even 3 yet. How cute is that?

New Bedroom

Miranda is growing up and too quickly I might add. We ordered her big girl bedroom set this week. And yesterday look what we
bought. ------------>
We are now in the process of picking out her paint colors. We're going to switch her bedroom as well because the middle bedroom is bigger than her existing room. Since we didn't know what Miranda was going to be, we had a neutral room set up for her. I'm really excited to finally set up a little girl's room. But I'm also a sad that my little girl is not a baby anymore.

Getting Dirty

I wish I could find more time to myself to devote to scrapbooking. I'm getting more and more into it and I love getting my hands dirty, creating new art. I never saw myself as an artist before but completing LO after LO seems to be art to me. Here is the latest one I worked on. The jornaling says: "You spent over 5 hours helping Nana plant her spring flowers. You never once complained, never once wanted to come inside. You LOVED every minute of it. You scooped, raked, dug holes, took dirt out of the bags, put flowers in the ground, and got SO dirty. You weren't happy with me when I made you come in for a bath." It was for a July challenge using 3 products over at MFM

Vertigo

Yesterday, was not fun! I had an episode of vertigo. I haven't had one in a few years. And when I've had them in the past they last for several weeks and the symptoms are 24/7. So, yesterday, it was just me and Miranda, and it hit me all at once. The room started spinning, I got all lightheaded and then things started going black, as well as a sudden wave of nausea. I got really scared and thought I was going to black out. It has never been that BAD before. Then my ear started filling up with pressure. I had to sit down before I fell down. When I felt a little better I went to look up some maneuvers to try to relieve the symptoms. I found one that said it had an 80-90% success rate. I tried it and it made me even more dizzy and really nauseated! Then, it also said to sleep in a recliner. So, I put Miranda down for her nap and I tried to sleep myself in the recliner. I am so not a recliner person, I only want my bed. I rested for a little while and felt extremely better in a little while. I continued the manuevers throughout the day and tried to sleep in the recliner last night. Didn't work! So, I just propped myself up on a couple pillows and basically rested, not slept. So uncomfortable. I can still feel a little lightheaded from time to time but nothing what I experienced yesterday or a few years ago. At least I'm able to function and take care of Miranda. I'm continuing the manuevers and hopefully that will keep the vertigo away!

Where does time go?

I went over to the neighbor's house to get some scrapbooking done and I only got 1 and 1/2 LO's done. It didn't help that she had the 40 year old virgin on. I never saw the movie. Needless to say I watching the movie more than completing LO's. My whole intent of scrapbooking the other night was to get Miranda's book started. I can't believe my baby is going to be 3 in two months. And I haven't even started her book yet. Where does time go? Where did I start? At the beginning of course. Her first day of life!
It still takes me forever to get one LO complete. Hopefully as time goes by I'll get quicker and be able to get more accomplished. Only time will tell.....

You're too funny!

This is one of Miranda's new sayings. So, I decided to use it for the title of this LO. We went to Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure a few weeks back. Miranda's favorite ride was the Cat in the Hat. We had to ride it over and over again. Needless to say, I was less than thrilled. The ride spins you around at certain areas. And I don't like to be dizzy. But Miranda sure does! So after the ride, you walk through the store, where they want to spend MORE money. We didn't buy anything but Miranda sure had fun trying the hats on. You're too funny, Miranda!

Scrapping Mess

This is why I can't get any work done that's scrap related. It's a mess. I try to get organized but I don't have any place to organize my material. I'm in a funk and I need to get out. I need my own personal space not only to organize my supplies but to work. Our dining room looks like a disaster as you can see. I need to come up with a system and a place. That will be my goal this week.

Daddy's job

We dropped David off at work a few weeks ago and I got these pictures while we were there. Everyday David is at work Miranda always says "Daddy drive big fire truck." Everytime she talks to him on the phone she reminds him he is at work and that he's driving the big fire truck. Everytime we see a fire truck, she says "that's what daddy does." But when we went to see them up close and personal she wanted nothing to do with them. We tried to get her to get up in the seat and turn on the lights but she wouldn't budge. She seemed scared. Sometimes that how I feel when David is at work. But I know he is works hard to do his job as safe as possible. He always tells me when he's working under pressure that he thinks of me and Miranda and does what he has to do to come home safe and sound.

New Life

I'm moving on with the blog. I'm out of IVF mode and moving into a new direction. Opening up a new chapter in my life. Just like this magnolia bloom. We planted 4 magnolia trees almost a year ago and one finally bloomed! I was so excited to see the first bloom. It reminded me of new life.

Devastating Loss

Well it's been almost 3 weeks since we lost all our embryos. We were devastated! We still are but we are trying to move on with our lives and figure out what God has in store for us. Sometimes it's hard to listen to Him and realize that it is His plan and not ours. It is even harder not being in control. When you want something so bad and cannot have it, no matter what you do......it can make you a little crazy. How did I cope? I thought for sure I would need antidepressants or a therapist. Having 3 previous miscarriages sent me into a depression awhile back but I worked through it. This time was different. I don't know how to explain it but I am okay. I'm trying to take one day at a time and be thankful for what I have. Yes, somedays are harder than others but I get through them. Someone once told me "Everyday is a good day, some are just better than others." I have to keep telling myself that. I gave myself a good pity party for 2 days and then I moved on. And I'm keeping on moving on.
What is our next step? Since this IVF procedure depleted our whole savings we can't afford to do anymore. And since our insurance doesn't cover it, we can't do anymore. We know it can happen because we have our miracle child, Miranda. We have to perservere and believe and have faith that God will grant us another miracle one day.